|
|
-
Beautiful Reception
After returning from work, school, travel, or whatever has separated you,
begin with a good greeting. Meet him with a cheerful face. Beautify and
perfume yourself. Start with good news and delay any bad news until he has
rested. Receive him with loving and yearning sentences. Make hard efforts
for excellence of the food & having it ready on time.
-
Beautify and Soften the Voice
For your husband only, it shouldn't be used in front of non-mahram men
(men who can marry you if you were unmarried).
-
Smelling Good and Physical Beautification
Taking good care of your body and fitness. Put on nice and attractive
clothes and perfumes to please your husband. Bath regularly and,
after the monthly period, remove any blood traces or bad smells.
Avoid that your husband observes you in dirty clothes or rough shape.
Avoid prohibited types of ornamentation, e.g. tattoo. Use the types
of perfumes, colors, and clothes that the husband likes. Change hair
style, perfumes, etc. from time to time. However with these things you
should avoid excessiveness and, of course, only act as such in front of
mahrem men and women.
-
Intercourse
Hasten for intercourse when your husband feels compulsion for it.
Exchange loving phrases with your husband. Leave your husband to
fully satisfy his desire. Choose suitable times and good occasions
for exciting your husband, and encouraging him to do intercourse, e.g.
after returning from a travel, weekends, etc.
-
Satisfaction With What Allah Ta'ala has Allotted
You shouldn't be depressed because your husband is poor or works in a
simple job. You should look at poor, sick, and handicapped people and
remember Allah
Ta'ala for all that was given to you. You should remember that real wealth lies in Iman and piety.
-
Indifference to Worldly Things
You should not consider this world as your hope and interest. You should
not ask your husband for many unnecessary things. Asceticism does not mean
not to enjoy what is good and permissible (Halal), but it means that one
should look forward to the hereafter and utilize whatever Allah Ta'ala
gave them to achieve paradise (Jannah) with moderation. Encourage
your husband to reduce expenses and save some money in order to give
charity and feed poor and needy people.
-
Appreciation
By the saying of the Prophet (sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam), the
majority of people in hell were women because they were ungrateful
and deny the good done to them. The result of being grateful is that your
husband will love you more and will do his best to please you in more
ways. The result of being ungrateful is that your husband will be disappointed
and will start asking himself: Why should I do good to her, if she never
appreciates?
-
Devotion and Loyalty
Be devoted and loyal to him, particularly in times of calamities in
your husband's body or business, e.g. an accident or a
bankruptcy. Supporting him through your own work, money, and
properties if needed.
-
Compliance to him
In all what he commands you, unless it is prohibited (Haram). In Islam,
the husband is the leader of the family, and the wife is his support and
consultant.
-
Pleasing Him If He Is Angry
First off, try to avoid what will guarantee his anger. But if it
happens that you can't, then try to appease him as follows:
1. If you mistaken, then apologies.
2. If he mistaken then:
a. Keep still instead of arguing or
b. Yield your right or
c. Wait until he is no longer angry and discuss the matter peacefully
with him.
3. If he was angry because of external reasons then:
a. Keeping silent until his anger goes
b. Find excuses for him, e.g. tired, problems at work, some one insulted
him
c. Do not ask many questions and insist on knowing what happened, e.g.
- You should tell me what happened?
- I must know what made you so
angry.
- You are hiding something, and I have the right to know
-
Guardianship While He is Absent
Protecting yourself from any prohibited relations. Keep the secrets
of the family, particularly intercourse and things that the husbands
don't like other people to know. Take care of the house and
children. Take care of his money and properties. Do not go out of
your house without his permission and put on full hijab. Refuse
people whom he does not like to come over. Do not allow any
non-mahram man to be alone with you in any place. Be good with his
parents and relatives in his absence.
-
Showing Respect for his Family and Friends
You should welcome his guests and try to please them, especially his
parents. You should avoid problems as much as you can with his
relatives. You should avoid putting him is a position where he had
to choose between his mother and his wife. Show good hospitality for
his guests by arranging a nice place for them to it in, perfection
of food, welcoming their wives, etc. Encourage him to visit his relatives
and invite them to your home. Phone his parents and sisters, send letters
to them, buy gifts for them, support them in calamities, etc.
-
Admirable Jealousy
Jealousy is a sign for wife's love for her husband but it should be kept
within the limits of Islam, e.g. not insulting or backbiting others,
disrespecting them, etc.. You should not follow or create unfounded
doubts.
-
Patience and Emotional Support
Be patient when you face poverty and strained circumstances. When you face
calamities and disasters that may happen to you, your husband, your
children, relatives or properties, e.g. diseases, accidents, death,
etc. When facing hardships in Da'wah (imprisonment, getting fired,
arrested, etc.), be patient and encourage him to keep on the path of
Allah and remind him of paradise. When he mistreats you,
counteract his ill-treatment by good treatment.
-
Support in Obedience to Allah, Da'wah and Jihad Cooperate with your
husband and remind him of different obligatory and voluntary
worships. Encourage him to pray at night. Listen and reciting
the Qur'an individually and with your husband. Listen to Islamic
tapes and nasheeds individually and with your husband. Remember
Allah Ta'ala much, particularly after Fajr and before Maghrib. Share in
arranging Da'wah activities for women and children. Learn Islamic rules (ahkam)
and good manners ('adab) for women. Support your husband's activities by
encouraging him, offering wise opinions, soothing his pains, etc. Yielding
some of your rights and a part of your time with your husband for
Da'wah.
Encourage him to go for Jihad when needed and remind him that you
and children will be in the preservation of Allah Ta'ala SWT.
-
Good Housekeeping
Keep it clean, decorated and well arranged. Change house arrangements from
time to time to avoid boredom. Prepare good , wholesome, healthy
meals. Learn all the necessary skills for managing the house, e.g. sewing
etc. Learn how to raise children properly and in an Islamic way.
Read authentic books or consult experienced people in this light.
-
Preservation of Finances and the Family
Do not spend from his money, even for charity without his permission
unless you are sure that he agrees on this. Protect his house, car,
etc. while he is absent. Keep the children in good shape, clean clothes,
etc. Take care of their nutrition, health, education, manners, etc.
Teach them Islam and tell them the stories of the Prophets and
companions of the Prophet (sallallhu alaiyhi wassallam).
|
|